The media is often a key driver of negative attitudes, especially in internalizing ageism

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Media often represents ageing as a crisis or a societal burden, with the ageing population described using metaphors such as “grey tsunami”, “demographic cliff” and “demographic timebomb”. Often, older people are depicted as “villains” unfairly consuming too many of society’s resources and cast on the “ reject heap” side of life.. Recently, I stopped listening to the local radio, Mixed FM as the announcers repeatedly and even proudly made derogatory remarks on their older colleague, Rod Monteiro as the old guy…etc etc. Not a day goes by when I switched to it that I do not hear such ageist remarks. What message are we sending to the public? It is no wonder we are less tolerant to our Malaysian elderly…What is ironic however is that ageism is such an ironical discrimination as we are condemning and setting a paradigm that prejudice our future eventuality. Each one of us is an elder in us at our calling in time. Such intolerance is evident in that we cannot tolerate having aged care facilities that’s noticeable in our residential areas. Such old people must be isolated far away from us in order not to contaminate the youthfulness of the community. It is well time that we reflect on our prejudice and demonstrate compassion to the aged as we are all shareholders in this dimension and it won’t be long before we would hope that when we get old the same compassion will be extended to us from the youth of the future.

AARP is urging Connecticut residents to petition state lawmakers to temporarily suspend privacy laws that effectively prevent nursing home residents from communicating with family members during the COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic

For several weeks, nursing home visits have been banned, except in “compassionate care” circumstances. In addition, privacy laws currently prohibit cameras in nursing homes. This includes the ability to connect through SKYPE, ZOOM and other virtual visitation technologies. This law effectively leaves more than 22,000 Connecticut chronically-ill and vulnerable long-term care patients cut off from their families.

Our Perception of Time as We Age

featured , happiness , mental health , physics , positivity , pyschology , time

Flora Fiction

The days are long and the months are short. One day, you’ve graduated high school, the next day you’re married with children. Work feels mundane and repetitive because it is, and the time you have off flies by like it was never there to begin with.

Feeling as though life is passing you by is unnerving, like you’re out of control of how quickly everything is happening. Interestingly enough, physical time–minutes and hours–has remained the same our entire life. What changes is our internal perception of how time passes by.

Scientists reason that our perception of time speeds up because we’re not learning as much information as we did when we were children. Many adults do the same thing every day, week after week, and although routine is necessary for success and stability, it doesn’t always engage our brain’s stimuli.

Some events from our childhood can feel more memorable than…

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Were you happiest at 16 or 70?

Happiness, Painswick, Rococo Gardens, Snowdrops


snowdrop 30

There has been a lot in the UK press recently about the newly published results of a study into happiness.  Called the ‘Happy now report’, it suggests that the happiest ages are 16 and 70. 

I’ve written before about when I was 16, “Back in ‘63” and it certainly was a good year for me.

And, now that I’m just over 70, I have to say that I am happy more often than not.  Like everyone, I’ve had my share of ‘ups and downs’ over the years.  I have grieved for family members and close friends who have passed away.  I live with chronic illness and pain.  I worked hard for most of my life and I have a very simple home.  But my happiness is not based on anything physical, financial or material.  It is based entirely on spending time with friends, family, or my dog…

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Who will pay – and who should pay – for long-term eldercare in the future?

A slim majority of Americans (55%) say that government should be mostly responsible for paying for long-term care for older adults who need assistance in the future. But when asked who will be responsible for paying for this care in the future, only about half that share (28%) say the financial burden will fall on the government. Instead, about seven-in-ten predict that family members (35%) or older adults themselves (36%) will bear these costs.

Similar shares of most key demographic groups agree about who will pay the bills for long-term care in the future. But these groups often differ about who should be primarily responsible for the costs of this care. Two-thirds of blacks and Hispanics (67%) say government should be mostly responsible for paying for long-term care for older adults, while about half of whites (51%) agree. Similarly, two-thirds of adults ages 50 to 64 say government should be mostly responsible for this care compared with about half of all other age groups, including those 65 and older. In addition, two-thirds of Americans with family incomes under $30,000 look to government to cover the cost, compared with about half of those with higher incomes.

Democrats see a bigger role than Republicans for the government in paying for long-term elder care (66% vs. 40%). On the other hand, Republicans are about twice as likely as Democrats to believe older adults themselves should be primarily responsible for paying for their care (40% vs. 21%). Relatively few Democrats (11%) or Republicans (18%) say the responsibility should fall mainly to family members.

The Role of Siblings in Eldercare By Calm Pond

aging issues, aging parents, communication strategies, eldercare, Siblings, teamwork, workingtogether

North Van Caregivers

Did you know that according to a survey by the National Caregivers Association, 76% of family carers say they don’t receive help from other family members. To me that seems sad, but here is an attempt to uncover potential solutions, gleaned from two blog posts I read.
The first one is entitled: ‘Why Caregiving Creates Tension Among Siblings’, by Gary Gilles, and can be found at:

Here are some takeaways for you based on that post:

  • Caregiving
    can bring out the best and the worst in sibling relationships, strained
    relations can ensue
  • Siblings
    can find themselves living out historical ‘roles’ based on previous family
  • One
    or more siblings can deny the condition of the parent(s), thereby protecting
    themselves from the painful realization of parent(s) decline. In time, however, denial can be replaced by
  • One
    possible solution to the sibling -non-involvement challenge is to schedule
    family meetings or…

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